“Full of Stars”

Six years ago, Mother Cat gave birth to a colorful litter of four. She always knew what to do and she always did this alone. The birthing process was unceremonious but laborious in the summer heat. She moved to clean her kittens quickly. She licked their noses and their closed eyes. With each cleansing stroke, she sent a prayer of strength: please, live. Her first kitten was black and white. The next one had three colors. The third had patterns like a fish. The last kitten to come out of her, who was also black and white, was an unfortunate runt, small, weak, and unmoving. She cleaned him too. They all had dark patches on their face. She licked their faces. She licked their bellies, limbs, and tails. She made sure to be thorough. She didn’t stop until she was certain they were shining. To her, they shone, before they moved. Her kittens always shone. They were full of stars.

Mother Cat lived with humans. They gave her their food. They let her rub on their legs. They do not hurt her and they even let her sleep inside their home. Human homes are castles for cats, for they offered protection, comforts, and food; and in Mother Cat’s life, she knew this home was also hers. Mother Cat was big, headstrong, and full of stars. The humans lived with her and they let her live. She had borne kittens before this litter and perhaps, she will have more after this. Mother Cat lived freely, but she could not say the same for her kittens. After her first litter, the humans would take away her children before they could open their eyes and she would never see them again. Mother Cat never understood their actions, but she could never ask the humans. They could not hear her questioning them. So she knew, this litter’s fate was not any different. She prayed for them to be strong and she prayed that they shine so bright for them to have castles of their own.

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According to the first vet I brought Mina to, she was most likely born mid-April. A summer’s child, if you will. This came as no surprise to me because summer truly is “kitten season” for strays and, if you’re observant enough, you will see them everywhere. I intended to write this piece to share more about Mina. My friends already know that I did not immediately took Mina in. She, alongside her two siblings, were dumped in our community, all who were too young to have been taken from their mother.

When I tell my human clients that I do not force any question on our animal friends, I mean it. Mina’s story about her birth mother is the short story I wrote above. It is also a revelation that is new to me. I only started asking Mina last year, if she would like to share more of her stories with me. Any story was already a privilege. Her memories about her cat mother were in visual blindness, but they were rich in other senses. Mother Cat felt soft and fatty. Mother Cat was nimble. Mother Cat felt wise, but tired. Mother Cat always fed them, until they could no longer smell her around. In communicating with me, Mina has repeatedly shared a feeling, which I try to translate as being “full of stars.” Her Mother Cat was full of stars.

Sometimes, when I have client sessions, Mina would sit beside me and just listen. On some occasions, she would tell me “that one is full of stars” but not everyone is full of stars. They have some stars, but not full of stars. Humans are not exempt from this. I asked Mina about me having stars, and she simply said “yes, just like me and that’s why I like you the most!”

We celebrate Mina’s six years of life this weekend. What comes to your mind when one is said to being “full of stars?”